Hand-holding makes us feel connected, safe, and supported.
Photo by Fe Ilya via Flickr
Is there better advice than this, to hold hands? Think about what it means. Packed in there is taking care of each other, feeling connected, and maintaining the safety of our kids. There’s the metaphorical “a hand to hold” to show support, and holding hands when crossing the street. Robert Fulghum, of All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten fame, includes this nugget of advisory wisdom in an essay: “When you go out in the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands and stick together.”
One of the most long-lasting and popular Beatles songs is, as I’m sure you know, “I Want to Hold Your Hand.” That, of course, has to do with the romance of holding hands.
Do you remember the first time you held hands romantically? For me it was when I was in sixth grade. I have no idea if the girl saw it as romantic, but I sure did—as much as a 12 year-old boy can be thinking romantically. We were with a group of classmates at the local roller skating rink. The announcer called for a “couple’s skate,” something that involved skating with a partner while holding hands. Round and round we went. I remember my hand getting sweaty. I even remember the song that was playing, Michael Murphey’s “Wildfire.”
Did you hear about the Iowa couple married for 72 years who died an hour apart? They’d been in a car accident and were in the emergency room. When it was clear their injuries were not improving they were placed side by side. Guess what they did? They held hands. When they died they were still holding hands, the husband departing an hour before his wife. After he had died, her heartbeat was visible on his heart monitor. Why?
Because they were holding hands.
By Andy Smallman
Beautiful thoughts. Really admire the work Andy and Melinda are doing at their Puget Sound School. Hope to find out about it first hand whenever I am in the area. Great work.
We have four daughters, some of them teenagers, and we stilll hold their hands when out walking. Because we have always done it, and not cared what others thought, I don’t think they even notice, or care, that it is not the norm to do so. It keeps us close, happy, smiling, and feeling safe.
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A simple touch, a connection, a journey taken together. Sweet
Simple, yet beautiful & poignant. Thank you so much for this wonderful post.
We can hold someone’s hand without being in their presence physically — your kindness classes have done that for me over the past three years. The end result is that I am not only kinder, but happier!!
Just a simple little gesture, and yet it means so much and gives so much. We should do it more. Bring a little tenderness back into the world!